That time I got chest pains from anxiety

That time I got chest pains from anxiety is actually right now! I’m not even kidding.

I mean! How the world has changed in the past week! The mind boggles.

I’ve been feeling a bit hesitant about publishing anything here because life feels just a little weird at the moment. Is it appropriate to be posting about topics that seem a little frivolous in light of the severity of this global crisis unfolding at the moment? Or do people need some escapism and entertainment to help them through this increasingly crazy time? Or maybe it’s a mix of both?

I still find myself refreshing Instagram and Bloglovin’, but I tend to be opting to read about different things now. I don’t seem to have the mental capacity to read certain posts anymore (travel, fashion & sales posts), although I’m sure that’ll change again in future. I’ve also noticed that my focus is short-lived now and I often find myself wandering off to obsessively clean surfaces and handles with antibacterial wipes.

Remember my morning routine post? (That seems like a lifetime ago now.) Well, I’m going to have to update that thing. Because I now spend my mornings wiping every surface and handle and washing my hands endlessly. Oh, and tackling the huge pile of ironing that I’ve been avoiding for months. *shrugs*

Anyway, back to my chest pains. So last week I started noticing that I was having strange pains in my chest, not so much a tightness – but intermittent pain. So I thought I’d make a doctor’s appointment to check whether I was coming down with a cold, a chest infection or whether I, in fact, had lung cancer. (Okay, yes, I’ll admit that my mind went there. And yes, I think it’s probably safe to say that I’m anxious over here.)

So, going to the doctor is not fun during normal times, but at the moment it’s enough to make a person sick – with anxiety! Because before I even got to the door there was a big sign saying that if I had any COVID-19 symptoms, I was to turn around and leave straight away, opting to phone a special number instead. Of course, it goes without saying that I sat as far as possible from anybody else in that waiting room.

Long story short, I had an ECG in the rooms before I left that day. Probably because I was having these intermittent chest pains and answered yes to having experienced indigestion/heartburn recently. (Those are two of the ways that women experience a heart attack, in case you didn’t know.) And then I went for a chest X-ray and a blood test! No messing around. My ECG was normal. And it turns out I don’t have lung cancer – I’m probably just experiencing chest pain from anxiety! Huge relief. And also? WTF!

So I’ve downloaded the Calm app and although I usually loathe paying for apps, I’m going to sign up for the premium package because I obviously need all the help I can get at the moment. And how great is that app anyway?!

Also, I’ve been reading (fiction). And watching The Sopranos. Plus, I’ve got high hopes to finally finish decluttering our home and getting through my ironing pile. And our lockdown hasn’t even started in earnest here yet! (At this stage, we’re doing lots of testing in New Zealand and watching how things are unfolding around the world so that we make good, informed decisions. But that status could change very swiftly.) UPDATE: We’re now at Level 3 and going to Level 4 from 11:59 pm on Wednesday, 25 March 2020. (The 2-staged approach is being used to give people and businesses time to prepare for lockdown.)

These are some unsettling times that we’re living in so I just want to publish this post to let you know that I’m thinking of all of you and hope that you’re keeping well wherever you live.

I also wanted to say…

It’s obviously important to keep well physically (and continue to wash your hands), but be sure to look after yourself mentally and emotionally too. Sometimes we don’t realise how much anxiety is building up inside of us as we’re presented with this changing world. (Just ask me and my chest pains.) This situation happening right now? It’s A LOT. Be kind to yourself. And to others.

Or clean out a cupboard. (Yesterday I cleared out our spice drawer and threw away all of the old spices. I’ve now only got two jars of ground pepper, some gravy powder and a jar of chicken spice in there! Time to replenish my stocks, I think.) Or maybe get to that chore that you’ve been putting off for years. Or maybe just read and watch TV. Whatever gets you through.

As middle-aged women, we are going through our own perimenopause and menopause journeys on top of all of this. So I want to remind you to get regular sleep, eat well-balanced diets, meditate, get some form of regular exercise and regulate your alcohol and caffeine intake – even more now than before. We need to look after our bodies, hearts and minds. *deep breath*

Be safe, everyone. We can do this. Chat soon. x

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Photo by Kat Jayne from Pexels

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