Welcome to the third midlife must-haves post in this new series on my blog.
If you don’t know what this series is about, you can read my first midlife must-haves post over here. It explains things in more detail and you can see also what I can’t live without at the moment.
Today Linda will be sharing 5 (or more) of her midlife must-haves with us. Welcome to Linda!
Hi! I go by many names, but the most common are “mom”, “Linds”, “YO!”, “best friend – that’s what he calls me”, and a number of others I’m sure my kids say under their breath.
53 years young, I nurtured three humans into this world. They’ve made it to 21, 19 and 16, and all up, I think they are faring well. They seem to be happy most days.
My joy comes from being around people who make me laugh, challenge my thinking (whether they know it or not), and also choose to be a little be adventurous in life. I am curious about the mysticism of life and enjoy trekking down that path. I’m currently working as a Behaviour Profile facilitator.
I waded through the Menopause about two years ago without a hitch (or so I thought). I still struggle with some melancholic lows for which I have a jar of “loving me – self-care” suggestions.
My must-haves at this time
4M’s – movies, massage, munchies, music
Feel-good movies. My current favs are Jazz singer, Secret Life of Walter Mitty (Ben Stiller version), and The Kindness of Strangers (currently on Neon). I love the pull of ‘longing and want’ in a romantic movie and the joy of it coming together.
Massage or a long soak in a tub (or both) gets whatever energy may be stuck, moving and it always shifts the stubborn (woefulness) within – so I can get back to being my natural upbeat self.
I love to listen to music. Again, a mellow genre works for my self-care regime. I have a Love Song playlist which I continually add to. May I just add that as I come out of my funk, I switch to a “sing out loud” playlist and that just gets me going (thanks for asking…Bon Jovi, Def Leppard, Celine Dion, and some Latin grooves to get the hips moving, kicks in about this time too).
Finally, I tend to keep to my own den during this time as a “mother lion” as I might snap at the smallest of things. (I do tell my immediate family if they are sensing this inward need coming on.)
Lastly, another “m” – I get mushy (aka crying – the ultimate release). And why we cry I don’t know, maybe it’s the welling up of the ocean within, that’s why our tears taste salty, or as the fabulous Anne Lamott says: “it’s okay to cry, as crying waters the seeds at your feet, and you don’t know what may have landed there”.
Friends
I get SO much of my joy from this life by being around people. I have got to a place where I surround myself with friends who lift, support, engage, share, challenge and inspire. And even those lovely few I have around who hold me accountable and for all these parts of them, I am SO SO grateful. These are not just ladies, some dear male friends give me these special gifts too.
Related: My midlife must-haves – Regina
Meditation
I have been using the Waking Up app for about 3 years now. I have the premium membership, which gives me access to theory, conversations and so many amazing people (one person being David Whyte – a poet I can’t get enough of). I do 10 minutes every day.
Expression tools
Self-expression is a life path for me – I journal every day – immediately after morning meditation. I start by listing 3 words of how I am feeling. I choose an attitude (like setting a daily intention) and then I also reflect in longer form what may be whizzing through my mind (concerns, reflections, desires and maybe what has been happening).
My go-to journal books are Moleskine Cahiers (see below), and a really good pencil. I will sometimes “off-load” when I am feeling overwhelmed and that could be any time of the day.
If I don’t have this journal with me, I carry a notebook in my handbag for mental moments on the run. I use a Zequenz – it’s super bendy and I just doodle and scribble anything that lands during my day.
Essential Oils
DoTerra Essential oils are my pleasure. I use them for skin, immune, mood and atmosphere support. My current diffusing support is a blend of cinnamon, cardamon, cedarwood, eucalyptus and cassia. It’s warm and sensual – perfect for winter. And I recently purchased a great little diffuser that plugs into a USB port, so can take it in the car or have it next to my laptop. (See similar diffuser.)
Photos
Photos pause a moment of joy, and allowing us to go back to that joy is just the best. With so many loved ones scattered around the globe, having access to photos of friends and family is a must. I would grab the box of albums and backup hard drives in a fire dash any day!
And finally
Other than that, I would say – a good “lady” doctor, a permission slip to say “hell-yeah I can!”, a travel bucket list; and books, books and more books. I wasn’t much of a reader when I was young, but now I just don’t seem to have enough time to read all those amazing stories – fictional and non-fictional, travel and food stories. I love stories.
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Thank you so much for sharing your midlife must-haves with us today, Linda. Your words have given us a peek into your life and loves; and your depth, curiosity of life and warmth jump out from this post.
PS If you’d like to share your midlife must-haves with the readers on my blog, you can! Simply contact me and I’ll send you some informational blurb so that you can be part of this (hopefully regular) series on the blog.
Email me at biancaswanepoel1@gmail.com if you’d like to participate!
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