Midlife crisis or quarantine fatigue. Is it the one or the other, or both?
Firstly, what is quarantine fatigue?
Quarantine fatigue is the result of the compounded emotional stress brought on by the COVID-19 pandemic over an extended period of time. It’s when you’ve had enough of the isolation, the lack of connection with your family and friends and the loss of freedom you had pre-pandemic. You become emotionally exhausted from doing what doesn’t feel like very much, day in and day out. You’ve basically been stressed for too long and you’re exhausted.
This pandemic has put a real dampener on life lately. I’m sure you will agree. We’re anxious about getting sick, we’re stuck at home a lot of the time and we might be feeling afraid about going out. Also, we don’t have any plans to travel – maybe because funds are scarce or because the borders are closed. Most of us are homebound with very little to look forward to and all the time in the world to read about all the calamities going on around the globe at the moment. It’s pretty dismal, I’m not going to lie.
And now let’s clarify the midlife crisis/transition
A midlife crisis is a transition of identity and self-confidence that can occur in middle-aged individuals, typically 45 to 65 years old.[1][2][3] The phenomenon is described as a psychological crisis brought about by events that highlight a person’s growing age, inevitable mortality, and possibly lack of accomplishments in life. This may produce feelings of intense depression, remorse, and high levels of anxiety, or the desire to achieve youthfulness or make drastic changes to their current lifestyle or feel the wish to change past decisions and events. – Wikipedia
So no-one wants to admit they’re having a midlife crisis, but to be honest, it’s pretty much a name that is used to describe our ‘midlife transitioning’, isn’t it? Many of us are refusing to call it a ‘crisis’ because that sounds too negative. And I totally agree with that sentiment.
What we’re going through is essentially a transition period, much like puberty was when we were teenagers. (Remember that crazy time?) Okay, so now that we’ve cleared that up, let’s talk about how we’re feeling. (Because you may very well be feeling this way too.)
Related post: Why midlife doesn’t have to be a crisis
Okay, so this weird feeling that we’re feeling – is it quarantine fatigue or is it a midlife crisis? Or could our midlife transition be exacerbated by pandemic fatigue? Or vice versa? I ask because the symptoms of both of these experiences are very similar. Let’s take a look.
Quarantine fatigue symptoms
- Physical fatigue (ranging from mild to intense), loss of energy
- Feeling unmotivated
- Irritability, irritating more easily; short temper
- Disturbed sleep, insomnia or oversleeping
- Anxiety (new or aggravated)
- Feeling on edge
- Sense of apathy, lethargy
- Emotional instability
- Feelings of loneliness and disconnection
- Feeling hopeless
- Onset of depression
- Feeling burnt out
Midlife crisis/transition symptoms
- Changes in your body
- Weight gain, pain and less energy
- Fear of death
- Spending more time with your partner driving you nuts
- Career and financial changes
- Feeling like your life hasn’t turned out the way you thought it would
- Feeling lonely
- Depression
- Anxiety
- Unhappiness
- Lack of motivation
- Dissatisfaction with career or job situation
- Obsession with appearance and loss of youthfulness
- Dissatisfaction with your life choices or your current life
- Insomnia
- Your life doesn’t feel the same
- Nostalgia for years gone by
- The pressure to still do certain things in life
- Unmet expectations
Related post: Things that happen in perimenopause that nobody talks about
Quite a few similar symptoms, right?
Previously you may have been able to remedy some of these feelings by going out with friends or travelling, but now we have limited opportunities to do those things.
You might now find that you’re drinking more and obsessing about your appearance because there’s so much extra time to be looking at yourself in the mirror while you’re stuck at home. You may also now have more time to fret over your mortality and longevity.
We’re also not able to spend as much time with family and friends which means our happiness levels are lower than they could be.
And in addition to all the obsessing, you could be feeling quite overwhelmed. You could be spending too much time focussing on your mortality, what you’ve achieved in life, your life’s purpose. And all the talk of the number of COVID deaths could also be making you feel anxious and even traumatised.
So how can we deal with all of these feelings?
- Eat healthily (it also helps to stay well to fight COVID)
- Make dates with family and friends to boost your happiness (within regulations, of course)
- Look after your inner peace (for example, meditate)
- Strengthen your mind and stay relevant (in other words – do an online course, read and keep learning)
- Take better care of yourself (for example, self-care and exercising regularly)
- Take a break from the news (because, mindblow)
- Declutter your home (simplifying and cutting back can help)
- Try an easy home makeover (re-arrange the furniture or move your pictures to different rooms)
- Try gardening or flower arranging (did someone say therapeutic?)
The benefits of a midlife transition AND the slowing down during quarantine
- This is a good time to take stock and get rid of unwanted parts of your life
- It’s a chance to change things up for the better
- You could find your purpose (for eg. helping those in need)
- It puts everything in perspective and lets you focus on the positive and get rid of the negative
- It’s a good time to focus on self-care
- You can reassess your life
So, are you experiencing a midlife crisis or quarantine fatigue? Well, it looks like it could be a little bit of both. And that’s probably why we’re feeling so exhausted!
In conclusion, I think we should use this opportunity to make meaningful changes in our lives to combat these feelings of quarantine fatigue AND midlife transitioning.
But most importantly: Take a well-deserved break and be kind to yourself because as middle-aged women in this pandemic, we’re going through A LOT!
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Do you have quarantine fatigue or midlife crisis symptoms? And what are you doing to deal with your symptoms? I’d love to hear from you.
Photo by Everton Nobrega from Pexels
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